January 28, 2017

Dear Derek Whitney,

I'm glad I have gotten to know you in College back at Portland State University.  Anyways, I am glad that you did not force yourself on me.  I am glad that you had the decency to ask me first what you wanted to do with me.  Anyways, I know that you are the first and only guy like that here, anywhere.  Everybody else here, well, I really don't know who the people are on these planets here.  There are so many people.  Anyways, I have written so much already, and I feel like it's going nowhere.  Anyways, I will just write the time that I want done in my notebooks and go from there.  Ok?  

Anyways, my immediate family here seem to be nice people.  They just leave me alone all the time.  And my immediate family and I rarely fight.  We always get along.  My father has been a tremendous help here.  He really is meant to be a source of inspiration.  But, I don't think that he is eternal like some people think that he is.  Anyways, reasoning or not, I have already written things down in my notebooks.  Ok?  

What is the good of reasoning and explanations and wishes if you have no hat for inspiration?  You'd be completely lost, nowhere to be found.  Anyways, why bother make wishes when people don't respect your wishes anyways.  They just do whatever they want and call your wishes an abomination on this Earth.  Wishes or reasoning or explanations are needed sometimes to make someone's dreams come true, or rather, whatever wishes or reasoning or explanations people give or not give, sometimes, people just keep quiet because they fear the unknown, sometimes, people just do whatever they do and people cannot do anything against them at all, no matter how many times or how much or whatever the fucking hell they want to do to other people to stop them in their tracks.  

Anyways, no one on Earth or Universe is Eternal.  Ok?  We are all just human beings here and animals.  The Devil God, Bahala may tell us things, and he may come here and tell us some more things, but, really?  Does anyone really believe that humans are eternal?  The Devil God, Bahala kills tiny black and chinese human beings there in Hell.  Anyways, I know that Mr. Ada Borstein is the only human there that doesn't get killed.  But, he can't make a damn effort in creating hats and inspirations.  Anyways, these hats and inspirations, they are all zeros, just plain losers.  There's only and always, only one Angel per generation that becomes and ascends to Heaven and Hell to become the next Ada Borstein.  Ok?  Those Ada Borsteins, turns out are all zeros and losers anyways.  Some people do not think so, but I know that Ada Borstein is not eternal.  Ok?  Why bother killing Ada Borstein and making him disappear because people are afraid to be stuck to the same damn Angels over and over again.  Ada Borstein does not love anyone.  He thinks he only wants girls that seem to be different, but when girls change, he throws them to the trash and gets rid of them for good because he is done here.  He knows he will never do it again.  He may be a studbucket piece of trash, but nobody wants live with fuckers who does you wrong, every single time that you are living here.  

Anyways, without wishes, there are no dreams.  Without dreams, there is nothing, whatsoever.  Without laws, there is chaos.  And how can Angels create chaos, if there were no wishes to begin with?  Angels make things possible by what, wishes or thoughts?  Anyways, why do Angels need thoughts or wishes?  What for?  I am sure that God doesn't require thoughts or wishes.  God just does things because he is God.  And there is no damn, justice for humans or Angels, anywhere.  Justice is a lie.  Justice is a pure and utter lie.  Justice is not Godly.  Justice is vengeance.  Justice is a crime.  Justified.  Bullshit.  Nobody needs to be justified at all.  People just need wishes to make dreams come true.  And Justice is or are not wishes at all.  
 
Mariel Rodriguez, bullshit.  She's not an Amy Angel.  Mariel Rodriguez is a damn fraud, ho, bitch!  Who cares about that stupid idiot ho!  Black vase bullshit on top.  There is no damn, black vase ho on top, ever.  All black vases hoes are in the damn bottom.  They are down there, in the bottom of the Maslow's hierarchy of food groups.  Those black vases are not even meats.  They are just grain, wheat for bread.  Anyways, Mariel Rodriguez did not invent or created grain, or wheat, or bread ever, even when she was an Amy Angel in the previous Kingdom of Angels and Oxen Gods and Goddesses.  

Nasira na yung mga yun.  They are gone.  Their records are forever gone, kapoof, gone completely.  Anyways, the Amys need only one record of heavenly divinity and that heavenly divinity is only one and it will never be again because it has been destroyed, 15 stupid times.  Ok?  Anyways, who cares about what Ada Borstein thinks of today.  All at once, bullshit crap.  There's always 2.  Who else would repeat, if not previous Amys themselves from other parts of the damn Universes?  Everybody in the Universes have been all Amys before.  I just know that Ada Borstein cannot do it ever again, even if he has become a damn, stupid, zero, idiot, Angel here.  It just goes to show you that whatever I wish for can come true.  Anyways, I think one of my end self here has been known to be destroyed by God, 15 times because Ada Borstein doesn't like thieves or people that seem to get "things" from him.  I just laugh at this now.  Anyways, how can people get shit from other people just by having sex with them?  And people change like they do?  Hell no.  Ada Borstein thinks that the Amys become evil or become really stupid people like he is and he kills these girls, make them suffer, and never loving them at all, just turning them into prostitutes because life is too demanding to be anything else.  

Just think about it, for a moment.  Ok?  Ada Borstein only likes girls that seem to be good people and are straight forward thinkers and are well, have cosmo brownies shit type of powers.  Once these girls are gone, and their intelligence dwindles and fades, and their behavior and thoughts and their personality, and the content of their hearts, and their character becomes so called, "TARNISHED", Ada Borstein throws them into the streets and turns them into prostitutes because life is too demanding to not be at all.  Anyways, what I'm trying to say is, Ada Borstein seems to want girls with attributes of good people, but throws girls or people and kills people who are so evil and just tarantadong assholes like he is, but, what he doesn't know is that he is attracted to girls that are seemingly too good to be true, and he doesn't know that what attracts him to certain qualities has these qualities himself to begin with.  

Why would people be attracted to other people with certain qualities if they don't posses these qualities themselves?  Opposites attract.  Pure and utter bullshit crap.  Ada Borstein is such a good person that he hates evil doers because he hates being evil.  It reminds him of the Devil in which he really hates and thinks of being really evil.  Anyways, everybody knows that Ada Borstein is evil in a lot of ways, anyways.  He just does things to destroy everybody else here that defies his will or defies his wishes or defies his law or order.  People are like that everywhere.  

My baby brother, Keanu Reeves hates the fucking shit out of me.  He thinks that my end self here will come back as an Amy Angel again just like what I am today and even more so, probably like a damn Ada Borstein again.  Heck, I know that I've been destroyed here already.  And Ada Borstein that he will not let me pass at all.  And Ada Borstein said that he will kill me by true decapitation here at the end of time.  Who the fuck cares?  I know this is inevitable.  It has already been told to me by Miss Amy Shadow Angel.  Anyways, great minds think alike, sana sila na lang ang magsama, Ada Borstein and Miss Amy Shadow Angel.  Miss Amy Shadow Angel likes these stupid, damn, bastard, Ada Borstein anyway.  Who cares anymore.  Nobody cares.  I don't.  I know my destiny now here and I know what I'm going to go through here.  Shit.  I'm time and magical powers here.  I'm a damn ho here.  I'm going to be a fucking prostitute here.  Anyways, shit, all of myselves are prostitutes anyways.  We are just fucking slaves here.  Nobody wants us.  We portray ourselves here wearing next to nothing and has sex with everybody that wants to have sex with us.  And people just kills the fuck out of us because everybody hates us.  I think everybody here are all just one Angel only, and the other people here that are starship cruisers are Amys of different designs and lives.  All other people on the planets are just regular human beings.  

Anyways, once my time here is over, I am done, gone for good because life is too demanding not to be and it is the wish of a higher power and intelligence here that gives life to people here, every single minute, every single second, every single hour, every single day, each and everyday, for the whole time here.  I don't have to wish and tell Miss Amy Shadow Angel to help people here.  She just does it herself because she is compelled and is more than willing to be with Ada Borstein here.  

Anyways, I am stuck here.  I don't think Ada Borstein really needs me to be with him at all just to get time and all of these magical powers from Miss Amy Shadow Angel.  She doesn't need me at all.  I am just a display shit fucker here.  I don't need to be alive at all just to make things happen here.  

And why do the Amys need Allan Manaois here to turn them into Amy Angels?  What is all of these nonsense?  Huh?  A human being turn immortals like himself into Angels?  How does he do that?  He has no cosmic powers like I do now.  He doesn't have didly squat.  He doesn't give me any intelligence or shit that I do here to make things possible.  I just do these shit by myself.  Why do I need this stupid asshole for?  Huh?  Just so he can make the fucking shit prostitute out of me?  

Anyways, Ashley, I think is the one.  She's ISIS.  She's the next Ada Borstein in the next Kingdom of Angels and Oxen Gods and Goddesses.  This is no doubt, for sure.  I have no doubt at all about this, whatsoever.  Ada Borstein is only a one time thing.  Anyways, he can trick me into thinking that he can be an Amy Angel again, but shit, these are all just tricks, just wishes coming from me.  Once I have sex with someone, all of my cosmic powers are all gone, kapoof, gone completely, banished into thin air and will never come back again.  And to make matters worst, Keanu Reeves couldn't stand the fucking shit out of me and just wants me dead.  Well, join the club, Keanu.  Everybody wants me dead.  They can't stand my silly ass here.  

Ada Borstein tells me that I don't change at all.  Who knows?   Maybe, I am couped up inside my house all the time and I never get out of the fucking house and I am never a Master of the Universe here, until damn, Ada Borstein sets me free someday and lets me loose and sets me up for failure and gets me killed and smited by God, 15 times because he can't see me take shit from him because I have never changed, until my memories have been erased.  Well, who the fuck cares anyways.  Once people loses their memories, people change.  I don't know why that is.  People just do.  

Ada Borstein just can't stand the fucking shit out of me here.  Ada Borstein can't stand the fucking shit out of me because I am larger than life than he truly is.  He's a damn nobody, just a foolish damn, stupid mortal, piece of shit crap, motherfucker.  

Anyways, magsama na lang sila ni Miss Amy Shadow Angel.  That's what Ada Borstein really wants to do anyways.  Who the fuck cares?  I don't.  I don't ever want to see this, stupid, idiot, motherfuckers here.  I've had it.  Enough is enough.  I'd rather die by true decapitation than come back again as an Amy Angel like myself today after being used and abused by the stupid, fucking idiots here.  

Anyways, there's always 2.  One of myselves here, I don't know which one and some people have some favorites, but there's only one, and there's only one, each time that will become an Amy Angel again.  And Ada Borstein is never going to do it again, ever.  Ada Borstein started out as a small time dude and became a damn, stupid, idiot in Hell.  What makes anyone thinks that he is Eternal?  Huh?  Anyways, jack be nimble, jack be frost, jack in the box, who the fuck cares about this shit.  Time is eternal.  Of course, but no one that is a fraud time is eternal themselves.  Small time dudes that seem to harbor time are never eternal, ever.  

Anyways, shit with the people here.  I'm included there.  Anyways, I thought my baby brother is someone in whom I can depend on.  He just shown his true self here.  He just died and what, became a source of inspiration?  Who knows?  Maybe, that's what he is only, a source of inspiration.  After all, he is no longer the damn, Devil.  Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack in the box, stupid shits.  

Faith Evans, bullshit crap.  That Jocelyn Mendoza is no damn, stupid idiot God.  God is merciful and giving.  That stupid, dumb, idiot, Jocelyn Mendoza is so damn selfish and destroyed me here.  She's always rich.  She's a damn, stupid, idiot thief.  That's what she is.  Anyways, it just sucks to be me here.  And Derek has told me that before when he was my boyfriend here when I was 23 years old.  

Anyways, that's ok.  Sometimes, you gotta win, sometimes, you lose.  Well, me, I'm a total loser here.  I know that now.  Who knows how many idiots enter my house just to fuck me here?  A lot of fucking moron idiots, that's what.  Ok?  God damn, stupid, idiot shitheads.  Anyways, I've already wished for my memories to be erased, but that damn, Ada Borstein doesn't want me to change.  

Anyways, I just wish to my mother here to never lose control and never lose faith in God.  God is the only one that can set her free and I know that she will be reborn in the Modern Era as a free human being in the Universes.  She has gone through so much.  She really is an innocent person.  Evil people will never amount to anythinpding to be anything that people thinks other people are thieves of absolutely nothing, nothing whatsoever, just damn, stupid, shit here.  

Bulok ang puso mo, Allan.  Ang pagkatao mo, Allan ay hindi bagay sa isang katulad mo at all, the source of inspiration for small time dudes everywhere.  Larger than life, you are not and you never will be, ever again.  Do you fucking hear me?  Do you understand what the fucking shit I'm telling you, huh, motherfucker?  You can keep your damn, stupid, eyes.  Nobody would care at all.  You can keep your damn glasses and cherries.  Nobody would care at all.  Nobody fuck cares here.  Pretty soon, this damn, monologue and show will be non-existent, whatsoever.  Nobody needs to know what other people are doing here.

Walang Awa Kung Pumatay.  O, isiksik mo yan sa kukote mo.  Anyways, sa ganyan ka lang na paraan marunong gumawa.  Yan lang ang tunay mong alam.    Anyways, who the fuck cares if some Amys are what?  Big?  What big?  What the hell is this big for?  You cannot make me big than I already am, no one can.  All this stupid trickery big shit is nothing.  I make my own destiny and I don't need your silly, stupid, shitty ass here at all.  All I need to do is write it down and lo, and behold, it comes true.  Shit.  LOL.  I am just happy to be alive here for a while.  I just know that once I am forgotten, I will never be anything anymore at all.  Manhood, he can go to Hell and die like a fucking animal there.  Manhood will never be anything at all, not ever again.  Understand?  He's no damn chinese or Japanese bitch.  This manhood shit is nothing but a damn, nigger, ugly ape shit ass, stupid, idiot, motherfucker, bitch.  Elton John, that's what you are, you stupid manhood shit.  Rocket man, you are not.  You never invented or created the damn Rockets or Intercontinental Ballistic Missiles anywhere.  You're no damn God.  God is not sick ever.  But, you, Elton John, you're a damn slave where you're going, you fucking understand what I'm telling you, you fucking shithead, Elizabeth Taylor shit?  Anyways, Tal Bachman, you are never.  Tal Bachman is just a fucking stupid shit loser here.  He's no damn royalty.  He destroyed everything in his path.  He has absolutely nothing, nothing whatsoever, nada, zilch, zero, just a piece of shit trash, motherfucker!  

This Elton John shit needs to get with his own people, his own damn, stupid, shitty selves that are female here.  I ain't never going to give this stupid, Elton John shit any belt here, whatsoever.  I'll fucking chop your stupid head off before you can make mince shit out of me, you understand?  And I know you will do the same thing to me.  You just can't stand the fucking shit out of me at all.  Anyways, one of myselves or two of myselves will deal with you and they will fucking chop your stupid head someday, when you least expect it.  Ok?  I feel no pity for you, whatsoever.  Hindi ka puwedeng kaawaan ng sino mang tao o nilalang anywhere.  You're just a complete, damn, foolish mortal here.  

Anyways, I don't need to hold on to anything.  I will just be here and wait like a fucking stupid shit here.  I am not Richard Marx.  This Richard Marx or this Richard Gere is just a fucking lie.  You did not create or invent these riches yourselves.  You gave me nothing, nothing at all.  Your touch is nothing.  It is just stupidity and just plain zero.  Anyways, I've already written things down.  

I will just wait here and just live like a foolish mortal here because I ain't an Amy Angel here, at all.  I will be destroyed and it is inevitable.  Hehe.  

I will go now, Derek.  Ok?  Thank you for anything here.  I wish you what you truly deserve.  

Sincerely,
Amy